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  1. #1
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    Default Gears Of War 2 ~ By Soda

    NOTE POSSIBLE SPOILERS

    NOTE POSSIBLE SPOILERS

    NOTE POSSIBLE SPOILERS

    Im writing a fan fic for what could happen in GeOW 2 it isn't finished yet and still needs to be fixed up but i'm going to post the first couple of pages here to get some feed back so i can make corrections and change things to make it better. ok here goes:

    Chapter 1:
    A small television flickered away in a corner of an old run down house; on the TV is an image of a overweight man, next to the man is General Hoffman, General Hoffman is talking about the war between the locusts and the Gears “We have destroyed the Locust horde’s home” Hoffman said “Only a handful of locust remain and our valiant Gears are destroying what little threat there is left”

    Two men are watching the TV; they are both wearing the standard Gear armour and both have there Lancer assault rifles lying on the ground next to them.
    “Get a move on Marcus were gonna be late” the first one said
    “Haven’t we done enough this week too deserve a break?” Marcus said annoyed to the first Gear
    “Well I suppose, after all we did save humanity, but we have a duty to keep fighting”
    “There you go again Dom” Marcus stated “sounding all patriotic”
    “Let’s get out of here” Dom said as he picked his Lancer assault rifle off the floor and slung it across his back

    Chapter2:
    Marcus and Dom met up with the rest of Beta squad, a newly formed squad for finding locust resistance pockets and wiping them out.
    Among Marcus and Dom in this group were, Augustus Cole and Baird,
    Augustus Cole AKA the Cole train is a huge musclier man who looked like he could tear a locust in half with his bear hands. Baird was a lot smaller then Cole but he more then made up for that with his intelligence.
    Baird is the closest thing to a Locust encyclopaedia but he is also cocky and extremely arrogant.
    There were three other members that made up Beta squad, Johnny, Graus and Marceni. These were all young junior Gears and didn’t have any real experience on fighting locusts.

    The seven gears loaded up into a king raven helicopter.
    In the helicopter was Hoffman who was the official leader of Beta squad. Marcus was the last to get in the helicopter and had to take the only avalible seat, next to Hoffman. The king raven slowly started climbing upwards, until it was at least 50 metres above ground.
    “Hey Dom” Marcus whispered “want to switch seats?”
    “No way” Dom whispered back happily
    “****” was Marcus’s only reply, but that wasn’t because of Dom it was due to the fact that the ground below them was disintegrating in front of his very eyes

    “Baird!” Marcus yelled “What the hell is going on down there?”
    Baird looked down to see that an emergence hole the size of a football field had just appeared below them.
    Out of the hole thousands of locusts were popping up and taking control of the air base that Beta squad had just left.
    “Crap” Baird said silently but no one was listening, they were all looking at the ground as wave upon wave of locust poured out of the hole. Several teams of locusts were entering the air base from different directions.
    Even though Beta squad was 50 metres in the air and the helicopter blades were beating rapidly they could hear the screams and pleas for help from the civilians below as they got slaughtered by the locusts

    “AH **** man look at all ‘dem suckas” Cole blurted out.
    Hoffman reached for the mounted radio behind him but a violent explosion rocket the helicopter and knocked the radio out of his hand. “What was that” asked Marceni sounding scared
    “It was them!” Baird said pointing towards a squad of locusts below them all wielding boom shots “Damn were screwed if we don’t do something” Baird said to himself. Marcus jumped on the King Ravens mounted machine gun turret and let loose on the locusts below “Get us out of here!” he shouted to the pilot between shots. The pilot didn’t need to be told twice and starting heading North towards Jacinto.

    Hoffman was desperately looking for the radio that had been knocked out of his hand. He finally saw it near the edge of the king raven
    “Marceni grab that radio before it falls” Hoffman shouted to Marceni above the roar of the machine gun and the beat of the helicopter blade.
    “Yes sir” Marceni said nervously as he stood up and started edging his way towards the radio “I’ve got it sir” Marceni stated triumphantly as he picked it up off the floor but as soon as he finished his sentence another boom shot had hit the king raven and sent it rocking back and forth, Marceni lost his balance and tumbled backward out of the helicopter. He quickly grabbed the framing of the king raven in a last ditch effort to stop himself falling towards the ground and the locusts, it had worked for now. Feeling his grip slipping Marceni said a quick prayer before he completely lost his grip but just as he had starting falling a strong arm grabbed his hand and started pulling him back up, it was Cole. “Thanks man” Marceni said as he was hauled into the helicopter

    “Here you go sir” he said as he passed the radio to Hoffman
    “Thanks Son” Hoffman said as he grabbed the radio and dialled in the frequency for HQ.

    “Were in the clear now” Baird said with a sigh.
    “Thank god for that” Marcus said wearily
    Hoffman started talking on the radio but only to be answered by static
    “This is General Hoffman, HQ are you reading me? I repeat this is General Hoffman are you reading me? The locusts are attacking Jacinto air base number 1. Do you read me?”
    “Sir you better take a look at this” said Graus
    “What is it Graus?” Hoffman barked angrily
    “Look over there sir” Graus said pointing to a trail off smoke over Jacinto
    “Isn’t that where HQ is?” Johnny asked Hoffman
    “Yes it is son. Pilot take us there, NOW!”

    Chapter 3:
    The king raven touched down on the HQ helipad around three minutes after Graus spotted the smoke.
    The once strong Gears HQ was now a smouldering pile of rocks and rubbish
    “Stay sharp Gears, whoever done this may be around still” Hoffman said quietly
    As if on queue several locusts appeared from out of cover and starting firing at the King Raven, Marcus once again jumped on the Machine Gun turret and starting forcing the locusts back behind cover, there was only one locusts left out of cover and he had nowhere to run too, Marcus turned the turret to face him and started firing. The locust was torn to shreds in seconds and Marcus stopped firing the turret. Everything became quiet and the Gears slowly crept out of the King Raven and into cover, Marcus was the last one on the helicopter and was just about to get out when a single shot echoed throughout the compound.
    “SNIPER” Dom yelled as a small Locust carrying a long shot darted to a new piece of cover.
    “Marcus, you ok over there?” Dom shouted to Marcus who was still inside the King Raven
    “I’ve been hit” Marcus yelled back to Dom “It got me in the leg”
    “Hold tight buddy we’ll get you a medic”
    Dom rolled over the low wall he was taking cover behind and sprinted up towards the next piece of cover, the rest of the Gears done the same.
    “What type of the Locust is that Baird?” Dom whispered
    “I’m not sure I haven’t seen anything like it before”
    Dom jumped over the second bit of cover only to be greeted with the sound of the long shot forcing out another bullet. The rock behind him exploded into shrapnel as the bullet missed his head by a mere inch.

    The exploding rock bit into the side of his face but he didn’t have time to feel it, he had to dispatch that sniper.
    Dom sprinted to the cover that was five metres in front of him hoping that the little locust didn’t load the next bullet quick enough. The sniper took another shot at Marcus in the King Raven but he missed, Dom waited for the next shot so he could locate the sniper. He didn’t have to wait long as Johnnies head exploded in a cloud of red.
    Dom jumped up and tossed a bolo grenade at where he though the Locust was, he was right. The grenade exploded and the locust’s body rose up into the air and then hit the ground with a satisfying thud.
    “That’s one less grunt to worry about” Dom shouted out

    The locusts that Marcus had forced into cover now started coming back.
    One took cover right in front of Marceni without noticing him.
    Marceni snuck up behind the locust and started up the chainsaw bayonet attached to his Lancer. He let out a savage scream as he sunk the chainsaw into the locusts think leathery flesh. By the time he had finished the other locusts had been wiped out by a combined efforts of the rest of the squad.

    Beta squad crept through the ruins of HQ looking for survivors of the locust onslaught but they couldn’t find anybody, all they could see where dead Gears and Locusts everywhere, no sign of movement except the flickering flames. Beta squad slowly walked into the only room that was left standing, Dom went in first and let out a gasp of shock as his face went a pale white. Inside the room were twenty three dead gears and on the walls written in there blood were four word repeated over and over “We have emerged again!”.
    Dom backed out of the room and bumped into Hoffman
    “What did you see in there?” Hoffman asked Dom confused
    “The locusts they survived!”

    Chapter 4:
    Beta squad ran back to the King Raven to find a Gear wearing the slight red armour indicating that he was a medic, he was treating Marcus’s leg wound while he was unconscious “Who are you and how did you get here?” Dom asked the Gear
    “My name is John and I’m the HQ medic. Who the hell are you?”
    “We though everyone from HQ died” Hoffman said to John
    “No, a few of use survived and hid over there in the hills, we couldn’t fight back because there were thousands of locusts and only ten of us”
    Marcus started coughing and slowly opened his eyes
    “Hey Dom, why do you look so grim?”
    “The locusts they survived. The lightmass bomb didn’t kill them!” Dom said to Marcus

    “What!” Marcus shouted out as he sat up “the bomb should have killed them all and blown up all the tunnels” Marcus stared around the helicopter and saw John the new gear
    “Who are you?” Marcus asked John
    “I’m John, you had a high calibre bullet lodged in your leg and I took it out” John said sounding slightly cocky
    “Him and Baird should be good friends” Marcus whispered to Dom
    “What do we do now?” Dom asked Hoffman
    “I think it’s obvious isn’t it?” Hoffman replied “We need to stop the Locusts once and for all!”
    “John show us to the rest of the survivors and we’ll radio in to airlift them out of here” Baird said to John






    Chapter 5:
    Beta squad and the Medic John walked over to the hills where the rest of the surviving HQ staff where hiding from the locusts. As the gears walked over the hill a squadron of King Ravens came flying in from the east and landed on the HQ helipad.
    “Bout time we got some backup” Cole exclaimed

    “Marcus, Dom and I will meet up with the King Ravens. The rest of you escort the survivors back to the helipad”
    Dom and Hoffman ran back to the helipad while Marcus had to hobble as his leg was still in a bit of pain.
    Upon arriving back at the helipad Marcus could see that a squad of about 80 gears was lined up in rows of 10 and all were paying attention to a man at the front who seemed to be the leader of this squad.
    “Who’s he?” Marcus asked Dom and Hoffman




    Thats it for now,
    tell me what you think
    oh and can anyone guess the secret to the name Marceni?
    If any one does guess it i'll umm say good job
    Last edited by soda; 11-27-2006 at 05:30 AM.
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  2. #2
    Redeemer
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    Default

    Reserved for more chapters
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  3. #3
    Redeemer
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    Reserved for more chapters 1234
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  4. #4
    MSgt. Shooter Person
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    I'm going to be a severe critic here, and say this: Dialogue is dodgy, not punctuated correctly, and slightly.. messy. Clean it up a little. Your setting is fine, and quite a possibility in Sera. However, how was HQ whiped out? Why didn't the lightmass bomb work? When did the Locust start producing HV bullets, and why?
    The enemy is on his knees. Six small craters leak blood over his tarnished armor, pooling around the single hand that remains to support his failing weight. He hears you aproaching, and tries to speak his defiance. All he manages is a blood soaked cough. Your foot slams down on his skull, and a thick, dull crunch can be heard as his skull shatters, the blood blossoming out around his deceased form like a crimson omen..

    http://my.livecard.net/24749/Crimson Ravenor

  5. #5
    Redeemer
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    Quote Originally Posted by Damon Baird View Post
    I'm going to be a severe critic here, and say this: Dialogue is dodgy, not punctuated correctly, and slightly.. messy. Clean it up a little. Your setting is fine, and quite a possibility in Sera. However, how was HQ whiped out? Why didn't the lightmass bomb work? When did the Locust start producing HV bullets, and why?
    cheers for that,
    i wrote it in about an hour so i'll try and clean it up a bit soonish
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  6. #6
    MSgt. Shooter Person
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    I liked it, but it bothered me that Dom said buddy too much. Other than thart it was great.

  7. #7
    Redeemer
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    thanks for the kind words
    i'll change the buddy thing as it was bothering me a bit too
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  8. #8
    MSgt. Shooter Person
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    oh and marceni, obviously red shirt aka carmine

  9. #9
    Redeemer
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    yep,
    marceni is an anagram for carmine
    ~I am the soda warrior~

  10. #10
    Redeemer
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    updated with chapter 4 and a bit of 5
    ~I am the soda warrior~


 

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